Recovery Archives - Christel Maritz

Yes, you read that headline correctly.

I, Kelly Fitzgerald, am lucky to be an alcoholic. If you’re shocked at hearing this statement, rest assured, you aren’t the only one. I surprise myself in thinking this way daily. Who would ever call themselves lucky to be an alcoholic? It seemed like a crazy notion to me, until well into my sobriety. During my first sober months, I saw and heard people refer to being grateful for their addiction and alcoholism. I didn’t understand and frankly, I was appalled. I was still in denial. I didn’t want to admit I was an alcoholic and I could never imagine feeling grateful about it. At three years sober, my views have completely changed. I now count myself as one of those crazy people who believes they are truly lucky to be an alcoholic.

1. I Don’t Have to Drink Anymore

Wait, isn’t that why people get upset that they are alcoholics? Not me. I’m relieved. Identifying as an alcoholic and being in recovery has saved me a lot of pain, the pain of attempting to drink normally. It was a merry-go-round that wasn’t ever going to stop. I’m lucky I was able to get off.

2. I Get to Work on Myself Every Day

When I was drinking, I never took responsibility for my actions. I thought the world was out to get me and I couldn’t fathom that I might have something to do with it. In recovery, I get to learn about myself and work on growing every day. This is the beauty of admitting to your addiction and evolving from it.

3. I am Able to Show Up for My Family and Friends

When I was drinking I was incapable of being a good daughter, sister, aunt, friend, or partner. I didn’t have it in me. I didn’t know how to show up for the important people in my life, yet I criticized anyone who would do the same to me. I consider myself lucky to have the opportunity to show up for all of my friends and family now. I’ve learned this through the 12 steps and working on my recovery.

4. I Get to Be Connected

I never realized how disconnected I was until I got sober, but at the heart of addiction is disconnection. We yearn for someone or something to understand us and sympathize with us. I had been searching for connection for years at the bottom of a bottle, but was surprised when I never found it. I was too numb to have a real connection with anyone. But luckily today, as someone in recovery, I can finally connect.

5. I’m Alive

While drinking, I had a shield of protection called alcohol. I thought I was invincible, and at times when I knew I wasn’t, I didn’t care if I lived or died. I wasn’t even aware that I had lost the passion to live until after I entered sobriety. Had I not admitted that I had issues with alcohol and could no longer drink, I might not be alive today. And if I was, my quality of life would not be like it is now…

Nothing changes if nothing changes. Sometimes I’m still baffled by the fact that this didn’t resonate with me the first time I heard it.

When I stumbled my way into the world of recovery, I was met with many words of wisdom from people with good intentions. At the time it frustrated me, as these sayings about sobriety did not seem to ring true for me. They sounded too grateful and enthusiastic, and I was not in a place to be grateful or enthusiastic. I was angry at the world and resistant to recovery. I was early in my sobriety and had yet to realize what it had to offer.

As time passed and I built up days, weeks, even months of sobriety, these stupid little sayings began to resonate with me. I found myself leaning on them for support, reminding myself of them daily and even repeating them to newcomers. They suddenly made sense to me, as sobriety became something I worked toward rather than against. But my favorite thing about these sayings are that they don’t just apply to sobriety—they apply to my life on a daily basis.

The following is a list of my seven favorite recovery mantras and what they’ve meant for my sobriety journey.

1. Strive for progress, not perfection. I have always been a type-A perfectionist. In fact, that mentality is part of why I drank the way that I did. I was hard on myself when I didn’t meet my own standards, so I drank to lighten the load. But since getting sober, this saying has been a lifesaver. I no longer feel the need to excel in everything I do, as long as I know I am doing what I can to improve that area of my life. This applies to sobriety, but also to life as a whole. For example, I competed in my first triathlon last week. I had quite a few hiccups along the way and didn’t do as well as I’d hoped. In the past, I would have been disappointed in myself, and bitter about my results. Instead, I was just proud of myself for finishing. I know that I have a chance to compete in another, and hopefully progress in my performance.

2. Nothing changes if nothing changes. Sometimes I’m still baffled by the fact that this didn’t resonate with me the first time I heard it. I kind of shrugged it off, thinking it was stupid and meaningless. But actually, it’s pretty deep. As far as sobriety, this saying has taught me that I have to make small changes in my life in order for the larger ones to take root. Maybe this means changing the places I go or the people I go with, in order to change my mindset about the situation as a whole. This mantra can apply to many aspects of life including health, relationships and finances. It’s so versatile, and that’s what I love about it.

3. No matter where I go, there I am. This one sounds so simple, but means so much. It’s basically saying that no matter where life takes you, you’ll be there. In a way it means that unless you make life changes, the same attitude you’ve always had will be the one you continue to have, so your life choices will lead to the same outcomes. Your “self” will always be present, so you should do your best to make that a self you are proud of.

4. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. I heard this often when I first got sober, and at first it didn’t really make sense to me because I hadn’t yet reached that point of desperation. In my own opinion, I didn’t feel sick or tired. It was only after remaining sober for a prolonged period of time that I realized I had been living in a sick and tired manner. Once I realized what living healthily felt like, I was able to recognize how draining the day-to-day motions had been when I was drinking all the time. Though it took some time to resonate with me, I think this is a saying most people in recovery can identify with…

For three more encouraging mantras you can use during your journey through sobriety, check out the rest of the original feature article, 7 Of The Best Recovery Mantras, over at The Fix.

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7 Recovery Mantras for Your Sobriety Journey
7 Recovery Mantras for Your Sobriety Journey
Disorders
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